random writing's/concepts

i hit my head against floor
table
desk
and keyboard
just so i can get it through my head
that i didn't get what i deserved
which was death
in all its glory
and silence

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kill me now
and regret it later
tell me the lies
and spill the ashes
all over the ball room floor.

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the king
the queen
the soldier
and the jester
who will in the end survive
and conquer this world?

...........................................

shut your eyes
count to five
realize
you were lying
this whole time
cut out your eyes
empty your mind
who were you in the end
kill me once
then kill me twice
but you'll never seek my advice
but if you cry
into the wind
and cry into the night
who will hear you
and ask you
are you alright?

''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''

i cant seem to see
i cant seem to laugh
i cant seem to cry
and yet
i feel the tears run down
my eyes

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maybe my heart is actually a rose
and my blood its pedals
maybe i'm just in a coma
and they're about to pull the plug